"Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's." ~Billy Wilder
I fully intended to Blog my Blessings early Sunday morning. In fact, promised to do so in my 'Unconscious Mutterings & More' post ... created & published shortly after sharing Sunrise-Sunset #2 on this blog . I thought I might add them to my Sunrise-Sunset post as I did last week, but that just didn't work out for me. My grandmother and father reminded me often that 'good intentions pave the road to hell' ... but this day has been a challenging one for a variety of reasons.
I apologize to PERBS (who came looking for this post yesterday).
I appreciate the comment she left on yesterday's post to let me know she'd dropped by and fully intend to check out her BYBS & other posts (as I normally do) as soon as time permits ... perhaps later today if all goes well.
After 'muttering unconsciously' at Small Reflections ... I went on in that post to write: "I haven't slept well the last few days ... had a nasty headache and feel 'marginal' this weekend, as if I might be coming down with something," then went on to write about some 'free-floating anxiety' I'm feeling around 'real issues over which I have no control." Then I let my fingers share thoughts rushing around in my mind a bit ... and ended with a 'link' to Mimi Lenox's Blog Blasts for Peace & some 'peace-thoughts' ... took Molly for a walk. When I returned & sat down at my desk, I discovered my computer was running a 'disk check' yielded a message telling me that some programs had been disabled.
I may have mentioned previously that my new Dell laptop has been 'crashing' periodically ... and when the 'dreaded blue screen with the dire message appeared yet again' ... I stopped everything and called Dell Tech Support. Interestingly, there was no long wait 'on hold' for a technician ... a fellow (with a difficult to pronounce name but told me to cal him Mark) came on the line within a couple of minutes to 'assess' my problem ... asked permission to 'take control of my computer remotely' ... and since it wasn't letting me do much of anything (neither Mozilla nor Word would load), I said okay (even though my previous experience with 'Paul' on my old laptop came to mind immediately).
'Mark' concluded I must have a virus and proceeded to tell me that he could 'take care of this' for me if I'd sign a contract and pay $239 which would cover 4 'major' incidents in the period of one year and unlimited 'minor' ones. In the more than 7 years I've owned Dell computers and called for assistance, no one has ever told me such a thing ... and being the conservatively 'mindful' consumer I am I had many questions. When he was unable to answer them to my satisfaction, I spoke with a 'supervisor' ... but it seemed they were both speaking from the same script. Eventually, they HEARD the message that I wasn't buying ANYTHING until I'd explored other options ... control of my computer was returned to me ... and the call ended. Apparently there's an email in my MSN box I can reply to should I change my mind.
Interestingly, the new Dell 'worked' after the call ... and although I got more 'error' messages periodically throughout the day, I was able to visit some blogs and respond to emails ... and for this I'm grateful ... especially because what follows is my (very timely) Daily OM 'Pisces' message:
"You may find that a resistance to accepting other people’s suggestions may make it difficult to make changes in your life today. It might be that you feel the need to protect your own interests, and you might feel the desire to control various situations as a result. Perhaps you could consider working on loosening your need to be in charge of things today. This would be a good time to learn how to be open to new thoughts and ideas. You may find that you will gain a greater sense of security over your responsibilities when you allow yourself to listen to other people’s suggestions. If you do feel your need to direct others arise, simply remind yourself that no matter how much you resist, change will occur with or without your input.
Making an effort to be responsive to at least one new idea helps us relinquish our need to feel control over a situation. Needing to be in charge often means that our fear of letting go overshadows everything else. Our feelings of power give us a false sense of security. We might think that things will remain constant, but change is the very essence of life. When we remember that the only thing we have control of is our minds, however, we become more open to the world around us. Change no longer scares us and we are able to feel our resistance to new ideas softening. By loosening your need for control today, you will set the necessary groundwork to transform your life."
So ... although I started writing this post Sunday afternoon, when it didn't 'come together' I saved it to finish this morning (or dump ... depending). I'm grateful this Monday morning for many things ... and here are just a few:
1. I slept like a baby all through the night ... and awoke without a headache.
2. I followed through with my intention to meditate and write in my journal this morning before turning on the computer.
3. The Dell booted 'functionally' and everything seems to be working even though it gave me a series of error messages when I shut it down yesterday evening.
4. I'm taking things at my own pace ... in my own way today ... and methinks that's a good thing!
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"I think we may safely trust a good deal more than we do. "
Henry David Thoreau