Interesting how the fog has moved in off the ocean after the spectacular pink and blue sunrise less than an hour ago ... it reminds me of the experience with Mt. Shasta appearing and disappearing as I watched from inside the mountain cabin one winter while visiting there to celebrate M's grandmother's 105th birthday. How much of life's experiences do we "miss" ... overlook and/or ignore while paying attention to something else screaming for our attention?
D is right ... I am like E in that I procrastinate and/or work to my own time frame ... and I'm like K in refusing to "hand in" the work she does for credit ... for although I write, I don't show it to anyone ... so I get no feedback ... or rather, I share minimally and receive minimally. The feedback I do get is reassuring and positive, but I have a hard time letting good "stuph" in and experiencing it in useful ways. Why is that? What might I do differently?
Change your mind about who you are and why you're here. Pretend if necessary, but take actions to demonstrate the truth of who you believe yourself to be.
Do you mean I should "fake it 'til I make it?"
If that's what it takes, yes! You've always had an excellent imagination. Use it now for this.
So ... what shall I choose to make of my experience of Mom's death ... and of G's departure from my life ... the end of my marriage ... the loss and regaining of my health ... the challenges I've faced in trying to reach and teach children all these years?
It's been an enriching spiritual journey ... leading me from ecstatic joy to the depth of despair and back again ... moving from hope to depression and back to possibility in repeated cycles around people and events in my life. In some respects I am as I've always been ... while in others, I've surrendered much of who I thought I was.
I see how it's all been PRACTICE and I am more SKILLFUL than I once was ... though there remain GAPS ... ROADBLOCKS ... FEARS to be faced, embraced and moved through. Coming to know myself and others as ONE does help me RELAX a bit and appreciate the ADVENTURE of life differently ... HEALING myself bit by bit ... sharing my reality ... opening myself to the truths of other's experience.
"There is no place for judgment in the mind of a master. There is only observation. The master observes but never judges. The master simply watches. First he watches the action, then he watches the result. The master is content to let the student experience the results of his own actions, rather than correcting the student." (pg. 67)
"When your life looks like it's falling apart, remember that it may just be falling together for the first time." (pg. 72)
"Thank you God for helping me to understand that this problem has already been solved for me." (pg. 76)
"God has no preferences ... there is no such thing as 'right' and 'wrong' in God's world -- just what works and what doesn't work in terms of what you are trying to do." (pg. 93)
the 4 quotes in blue (hand copied into my journal) are from
Questions and Answers on Conversations With God
by Neale Donald Walsch
2 comments:
I like the conversations you have with yourself. I do that too.
MPJ - Once upon a time it worried me to realize I had multiple voices in my head. These days (living alone as I do) it's nice to have someone to chat with (other than the dog and cat). LOL
I do wonder occasionally how many others do this thing ... and now I know of at least three (Walsch, you, and me) so thanks.
Hugs and blessings,
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